Not to be called by any other name

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Oh corruptible mind, lost in time.
Stuck in the past, future ahead seems so far behind.
Lost in my illusion ,or delusion should I say,
of emotions of grandeur.
More specifically those that love can portray.
All in my mind, the playing tricks on my heart.
It's just that I want something so bad- true love...
only to find a true farce.

Believing I'm special...
My love, my emotions, and all the affection that I have to give.
Only to find, which is always revealed in time, that I...
am no more special, unique, and/or complex than the last man.
Which I now realize, just like he probably did.

So, what is the purpose, the reason behind it all?
Live, enjoy life, eventually fall in love...
then for it all to be taken away and only be left with the fall.
Or maybe that dreaded phrase, "let's just be friends" or
"I'll give you a call".

Does that mean live life bitter?
Not look forward to falling in love at all?
Most definitely not, always look forward to the upliftment, not the fall.
Don't focus on the initial emotion or the commotion that it can bring.
Learn to love yourself for who and what you are.
Once that's done, your heart will sing.

Sing of praises, sing of joy. The partner that you attract then will be true.
Not just a fleeting moment of lustful noise.
They will love you for you and you will love them for the friends that you have became.
It won't be based on lustful acts or physical attributes
Or maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic, in love with love,
not to be called by any other name.

~Flowriter

This is all I ask....

Create in the moment
A moment of clarity,
A moment of truth.

Show me the way,
The way to live,
The way to love,
Vibrant, pure and closer to you.

I don't know,
No... no, yes I do.
Transition me from the place where I am
To a smooth existence, a bright light leading others, that are like me confused, to you.

Help me;
For, the choices are many,
but my decisions are few.

I'm told that I am a rare precious creation, a jewel...
Your child created, specifically with a purpose, by you.

However, I'm confused, and instead of clarity...
I run to drugs, lust... the addictions that I use.
My spirit yearns to do what is right,
but it's my flesh that has me do what I know I should not do.

I know that I'm his wife...
that he should be the affection of my life,
but my mind, my eyes, my femininity
shows me and tells me that
there are so many other loves'...
lusts to choose.

I say, I'm going to do the right thing.
I bought a replacement for my pawned wedding ring.
Then, I wonder if I'm being true to myself.
He asked me if I was in love with him, I told him no.
Oh God, I need your help!

Create a moment of clarity.
A moment of truth.

Show me the way,
The way to live,
The way to love,
Vibrant, pure and closer to you.

Then, after that...
Give me the strength to follow your instructions through.

My Sweet Succulent Cherry

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Oh sweet succulent cherry.
From whence is the blossom from where you came?
So heavenly, your juices overwhelm my palette
Causing my emotions to grow...to that of love
and to be called by no other name.

I traveled through orchids...
tasted grapes in their youth and when ripe and full.
I've allowed their juices to ferment and became intoxicated with their essence.
And still, none have come close to you.

I've plucked the ripest of plums
And indulged to limits that far exceed full.
I've licked and sucked on their seeds
And would you believe, that in each occurrence,
They reminded me of you.

I even tried a pear, such a oddly shaped one.
It's juices was sweet and texture quite nice.
However, I was less than satisfied when the whole experience was done.
Not much of a chance of it happening twice.

Oh sweet succulent cherry...
What is the secret that you contain?
To constantly be in my heart and on my mind
And from your sweetness, I am unable to refrain.

Could it be... your curvature, your color...
oh so sweet to the finger-tips and pleasing to the eyes.

Or could it be... your wonderful sweet, but tart taste, and the way your pit,
when in my mouth, against my tongue, caresses and glides.

Or is that I can hold you and caress you by the stem...
tickle your pit... dare I not spit. Remove it from its womb and devour the rest of it.

It... being you.

Tell me, my dear sweet succulent cherry, what am I, your admirer to do?

I remember the day when we first met.
Occurrence of such, are not easy for one to forget.
Watching others indulge in you
Incited an emotion... envy perhaps... or jealousy I guess.
Seeing the joy that they displayed, I knew that was a joy I had to get.

I had to taste you for myself.
I couldn't get enough of you..
I prepared you and had you in so many ways.
You soothed me through troubling times
and comforted me on lonely days.

You became my fruit of choice,
Not any other fruit would do.

Never did I imagine there would be a shortage of you.

But, yes it's true...
And it is a great sin. Not knowing...
If I will ever engage and indulge in your sweet succulent taste again.

Oh sweet succulent cherry...
From whence is the blossom from where you came?
So heavenly, your juices overwhelmed my palette,
which caused my emotions to grow to that of love,
and not to be called by any other name.

~Flowriter

To All Who Are Afraid

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Chris,

Have you experienced life beyond dreams…
Pain beyond screams?
Beheld a plethora of emotions…
Only to realize none are as real as they seem?
Felt hot tears trailing down your face
As cold wind from crystal blue skies leaves dry salt tracks
As you reminisce of the last time you had a warm embrace.
Reoccurring thoughts plague the mind
Of the last time… you gazed into eyes that told the story of love…
Imagined in the heart, fantasized in the mind, lost in the past, and in the present, you desire to find.
Only to run it away, why… you say?
Fear of the unknown, better yet, fear of the returning of the painful decay…
Of releasing something so precious to you, not to receive anything in return…
Except for pain… pain that doesn’t go away… pain that is not physically felt,
but mentally torments you day by day.
Self sabotage? Possibly.
Guarding, protecting your heart… most likely…
Not leaving much room left for trust.
Creating a strange predicament…
Wanting love, intimacy, a true relationship…
But without trust, the only thing you establish is lust.
Meaningless sex, mentally un-perplexed… unable to affect or infect the soul.
The effect of such… endless trials of trying to fill your emotional hole.
Again, I ask…
Have you experienced life beyond dreams?
Pain beyond screams?
Once you stop trying to protect yourself and let go.
Trust GOD.
He has provided you with more than you think…
And desires to give you more than you will ever need.
All you have to do is trust Him, let Him love you, and…
Believe.

~Flowriter

Divorce Me

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I'm not ashamed to say that I've been pained.
From the trials and tribulations I've been through.
Deepest scars of all were caused by you...Q.
On you...was there a mark?
A scar?
A deep down missing place felt within your heart?
No.
Just an empty abyss, filled with joy and bliss.
A life of freedom, gained by lies...
all this due to minus Chris.
Yes. So Godbless...you.
I have no regrets.
I don't wish to turn back.
I leave it and you...exactly where yall at...
In the past.
No ill feelings harbored.
Nor vengeance desired.
You are what you say you are...
A Stormy Hill and I thank God for doing His will...
for quenching that fire, elevating me higher,
removing me from that situation for He knew I was tired.
I thank Him daily for what He has taken me from...
And allowed me to go through.
Only thing left is to legally not be attached to you.
You see, I not only know the truth,
but I walk in it too.
The truth of the matter is...
You had long since stopped loving me...
And I was too blind to stop loving you.
Now, you are almost free...to be all that you can be.
Only thing in the way... a signature.
Divorce me.

~Flowriter

Help Required

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Painfully known the lack of love shown.
Knowing that I should leave, my heart bereaved.
Unable to move, the muscles in my heart torn.
Always on my knees begging the Lord please...

Enable me.

Stuck in the mist.
Pecked on the lips by an empty unfeeling kiss.
Wondering if...this is all that life has for me.
Yet, I still have hope.
But, it's getting harder to cope.

Oh Lord, please enable me.

Affection...gone.
Tenderness...amiss.
The act of making love...
Replaced by meaningless sex.
Oh Lord, I desire so much more than this.

Enable me.

Empty touches.
Cold stares.
Words devoid of love.
Thoughts of the future lack care.
Where to go from here...
I'm unaware.

Enable me.

~Flowriter

Have you seen my heart?

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Have you seen my heart?

It’s no where to be found
I’ve looked high, I’ve looked inside
I’ve searched the ground.
It’s no where around.

I keep telling myself,
“one day it’ll show up”,
“it’ll come back”,
“it’s not too late”.
I’m starting to realize…
It’s too late for all of that.

The blood that is in my veins
that once caused my heart to thump.
Now, flows into an abyss,
A bottomless pit
That the deepest cut could never fill up.

I try to tell myself to care,
Because maybe they do.
I attempt to believe that they need me.
But even a blind man can see
With all the years apart,
The void grew.

Plus, there’s the reliable,
The dependable,
The confidant
The new used to be you.

Whew…
Have you seen my heart?

I even tried to replace it with new, artificial means.
It’s a good strong heart,
Has good intentions,
But it doesn’t stop the hope
And never-ending the dreams.

The loss I have.
The memories I console
The decisions and trades I made.
Have me less than whole.

Have you seen my heart?

~Flowriter.

Moving from F.O.G to C.O.G

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See the vision.
Hear the heart.
Journey the path.

Once again, it's time to start.

Tear drops and petals of love.
Seem like the murmurs of old.
Peacefully free,
Spreading my wings... like a dove.
Soaring through the air,
Expressing my love... with my pens' blood.
Soulfully done in the dark,
Awaiting a new horizion.

Once again, it's time to start.

Releasing my vision.
Correcting my mind.
Submitting unto HIS will.
Remaining humble
And
Give HIM HIS praise and glory...
Everytime.

I once was in the F.O.G
Just a Friend of GOD.
But HE transformed me,
called me HIS child
Made me a C.O.G in the machine of life
cleared my eyes
And through my talent,
I try to lead the lost to Christ.

At times, it's truly hard.
That's when it's time to start,
moving righteously with heart...
as a true...Child of GOD

~Flowriter

Yahshua

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Unseen, but felt.
Not audible, but heard.
Never lies, so trusted.

He is my GOD.

Knows me better than I know myself.
Knew me and loved me before I became myself.
Never leaves me and always offers help.

He is my GOD.

Takes me through to bring me to...
The desires of my heart.
Become the man that He desires me to be.
Becoming a living testimony.
Help the mentally enslaved be free.

He is my GOD.

I tend to say that I was...
Lost, but I never was.
Alone, yet He was there.
In trouble, but He always supplied the answer.

You see,

He is my GOD...

And He cares... for you and me.

Thank you, Jesus, for calvary.

~Flowriter