Saturday, October 29, 2016

How Did I Get To This Point?

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How did I get to this point?

Mental delusions that come to lustful conclusions.
Desiring to drink from my own well,
but physically impotent regardless of the medicine I've been using.

Somewhere along the line, I got lost.
Mentally tossed from this to that.
At one time my walk with the Lord was so strong...
Now, I don't know how to get back.
On track.

Imagine that.

Demons no longer pursue me.
They found me...
wishing to ground me...
For no reason at all I find my heart pounding.
Fear is compounding... and my strength...
is fleeting.  It's beginning to be reminiscent of the wind...
Something that I feel, but unable to grab.
Leaving me in this weak state that I'm in.

Tell me...

How did I get to this point?

I hear the chuckles and giggles of old friends and passerby's.
Lovers that once adorned me, ignore me,
and at home, where it should get  better, I'm fed lies.
Another part of my heart, no, my soul dies.
For I cater to her needs, add to her things that she may flaunt.
Yet, none of it matters because I can't deliver her wants.
Having me question my manhood.
I'm telling you, it isn't all good.

How did I get to this point?

I know.

I've allowed the illusion to become my reality.
The distractions captured my attention.
My journey almost a forgotten mission.
The clanging of the world over-ride my Guide,
making it difficult for me to listen.
My soul being fed garbage,
my spirit malnourished,
and brain to focused on the physical,
and in this battle,
spiritually inefficient.

So, in this weak state...
being this broken man...
being this lost soul,
and almost believing the lie that I'm doomed to be damned.
I cry out unto the Lord;
for it is He that remains constant.
Only I am in disarray.  I surrender all that I am...
                    or thought that I ever was.
To be nestled in His bosom,
lead by His hand,
encompassed with His purpose,
spiritually fed through His wisdom,
with the understanding that I, by His grace,
through all things... can stand.
Especially when empowered by the true...  I AM.

And this is how I will move on from this point.


~Flowriter

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Forward

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I'm at a age where the magic of the world is beginning to disappear.
Where love is dwindling and faith in people...
Well, let's just say it doesn't live in here.
In here, being my being...
My mind, soul.
It's quite honest to say that my spirit is focused elsewhere.
The wonderings on and what could possibly make me whole.
My purpose if you will.
My creators perfect design of life and in it where I fit.
And if... this existence that I contain is all that I'm left to live.

In my youth, hope and the possibilities of the life to come
kept me motivated, invigorated, and in anticipation.
However, those days are long gone.
Life has showed me my mistakes
and no matter how much time has passed...
from certain things, life refuses to let me move on.

Still, as dreadful as my life has become...
Uneventful and boring.
I find peace in knowing that all of this...
regardless of all of that...
will one day be done.


~Flowriter

Monday, September 26, 2016

Used

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Trust...
Truth...
Seldom known
Often misconstrued.
Hard to believe that the ones closest to you...
that these are the tactics they use to abuse.

Reality is... that you (I) don't mean much.
That desire for closeness, family.
Is the illusion that we desire, but has us out of touch.
For, my presence...essence...
is only used to get through.
It's my past that's remembered, embittered,
and held on to.

In an effort to enhance the illusion...
Changes are made,
plans are laid, and
sacrifices by the dozens.
Only in the end to realize we've been played.
Which was their plan from the beginning...
even when they said it wasn't.

Truth...

The years that has passed...
The experiences that went unshared...
The moments that I was cried for...
wished for...
and was never there.
I wish to rekindle...
I pray to embrace...
I long to relive.
Yet, it's only regret...
day after day that I face.

Trust...

Time has continued.
And individuals have grown.
I have aged, and yet,
my mistakes live on.
Feelings have changed
love for me has dwindled to a drip.
While my replacements, love for them,
like a raging river, love flows on.
And still, my illusion won't let me quit.

You see,
It's all that I have to hold on to.
The dream, the desire, the wish...
to be closer than what I am,
to be truly loved for who I've become,
and not who I was.
To be seen for the man that I am,
and to believe that that is more desirable
than achieving retribution, revenge on
the boy that I was.

That is where my hope lies
and my truth lives.

Truth...
Trust.



~Flowriter

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Something to Ponder

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If I was to tell you that evil doesn't exist,
would you believe me?
Or would you ponder on the happenings in the world.
Then come to the conclusion that I was lying?

Hmmmmm...

Both are true.
Evil doesn't exist,
but is manifested by the choices that are made.
Demons are powerless
and can not exist in a pure soul.
But those who CHOOSE to give in to sinful nature
welcome evil and empower demons to dwell within.

This is how evil is manifested in the world.

Nothing is by happenstance.
The Bible calls it testing.
In nomenclature of today
it is giving in to your unmoral, fleshly desires.
This plants a seed... that grows like a weed.
Spreading to every part of your mental, physical and spiritual body.
Pulling your strings,
creating a mental screen...
that will invade your mind, heart, soul and dreams.
Until it becomes your actions.

Voila, evil exist.



~Flowriter

Monday, May 9, 2016

My Lord

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Almighty creator, my most benevolent God.
My heart, mind, body, and soul cry out to thee.
Have mercy on me.
Precious are your precepts,
they are my most valuable guide.
Yet, this world... my Lord
has your child severely tried.
My up has become down,
My aspirations have become unfound,
And my spirit is beginning to sullenly drown.

Help me my Lord.

Dreams seem unattainable,
a way out... unfathomable.
So, my hopes and dreams I place at your feet.
Only you can replenish my soul
With your manna of heavenly meat.
And this ache in my heart...
And this loneliness I feel...
Only you are able to heal and complete.

Touch me my Lord.

I await for your unmerited favor,
And for my blessings to pour down and pool.
And for the day to come that I'll savor...
when You make my enemies my footstool.
For the lies and secrets told in the dark,
to be exposed in the light.
For the emptiness I contain inside...
to be filled with your essence,
therefore enabling my spirit to shine bright.

I need you my Lord.

To reveal my purpose,
then give me the strength and courage to move in it.
To enhance my confidence and endurance,
So that my race, I can successfully finish.
To streamline my focus,
So the distractions of this world, I no longer see.
To impart upon me knowledge and wisdom,
So that I, not only will be Your man...
I will be a man that can lead.

Breathe on me Lord.

Unhinge me from my past
that this world constantly reminds me of and shadows me all day.
Free me from the ridicule of what was,
and bathe me in the new man that you created me to be.
Basically,
I need more of you Lord...
and less of me.

In Jesus' name,

Amen.



~Flowriter




Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Flows just poet This


(Try this one forward and backwards, top to bottom. Then upside down, bottom to top forwards and backwards. )

Poets.
Come.
Shining Through
Embers bright, dark of Night
Light compelled, as well Misconstrued
Enhanced poetically, this witches Brew
Dance spiritually, artist of spoken words Chant
Back-ground, drums are lulling, fire around Circling,
Back down stamped hands, heads moving forward and back Jerking.
Hurting, the mind, while fingers still ...Snap
See I, is it working? Think so, Black.
Flow I Think?
Flows just poet This...
This as Just.
Spirit Creative.
Free.

~Flowriter

Monday, March 14, 2016

Hey

Any comments? I would love to hear from you. :-)

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