Saturday, October 27, 2012

No Detour Ahead

Dark moon rising,the twinkle of the night is the only light shining.
Cold careless whispers, evil thoughts defining.
Searching for solace, unable to find it, the mind continues pining.
Wanting, hoping, praying for...
Peace, purpose, direction, fulfillment, something more...
Than this bare existence that I've been plagued to explore.

Yet, there's no detour.

Surprisingly new, clouds span the sky with a crimson hew.
Yesterday, gone. Last night, faded away.
Blessed to be refreshed, like the grass is with the morning dew.
And still, on this path I remain... I stay.

There's no detour ahead.

On this path I stroll,
with no one to console.
Tribulation, pain, and strife attacks my being as a whole.
Wanting relief, a focus, something to distract my soul.
Yet, my burden, my yoke is my achieving my goal.

I choose not to turn.
I pray that my soul doesn't burn.
and that... my heart doesn't grow cold.
So many unanswered prayers thru closed clenched eyes I stare...
at my future, at my journey, while being tormented by my past.
Therefore, there's...

No detour ahead.

Only with Gods' help will I last.


Sunday, September 23, 2012

Weatherby Plantation

It's been here for years.
Solemn existence, dilapidated walls,and unmanned fields.
House with only two patrons and cat squeals.
There Ms. Caterbury lives with her butler Bugsbee tending to her needs.
Along comes a man, Hugh, with a plan...
to restore what majesty the Weatherby Plantation once obtained,
Atleast he believed.

Ms. Caterbury not only produced, but indulged in her own sour mash.
Listening to her visitors' desires, she told him,
"why don't you go start at that old barn out back".
She had been avoided looking at him,
But as he knelt down by her side, they shared gaze.
at which time he said, "you have beautiful green eyes".
She gave him an askewed grin.
Happy to have a young man grace her presence once more.
Then, he got up and made his way outside.
Moving towards that old barn, occassionally looking back now and again.

The old barn was not only a barn,
It was an old slave quarters, shared by the slaves and horses.
Beds, made of hay for the slaves,
which at times was eaten by the horses in the stalls.
Underneath the barn, much larger than a crawlspace, was a place
where the studs and sometimes the master would produce more spawn.
By raping, taking, and breaking down a family structure
to build up workers for the field.
This is what their wealth was built on.

As Hugh went into this room,
he could see that cats had thoroughly taken over.
They didn't even run away as he got closer.
He could feel their eyes following his every move.
He became highly uncomfortable and constantly was looking over his shoulder.
Watching his every step and covering his nose from the terrible stench.
He reached down to grab what looked like a letter, possibly from a slave or a main house resident.
Only to recieve a frightening scratch from a cat.
Then, a myriad of cat cries as he tried to make his way outside, he tripped over a pair of fetters and nearly broke down the fence.
He knew that his work was cut out for him
and this would be far from quick.

"Forgive me, my good sir, a little help if you don't mind",
Mr. Bugsbee said while standing on a ladder attempting to cut away a branch
from the newly constructed telephone poles' power line.
"Not a problem. Did you know that that barn was overrun with cats?"
Hugh responded, while rubbing his hand and grimacing as he looked back.
"Oddly enough, I'm forbidden to travel in there."

Working together the pair caused a branch to crash to the ground.
Alerting Ms.Caterbury, causing her to come to the door and investigate the sound.

To be continued...

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Dear Lord....

Time can only tell
What the future may hold.
I've given all that I can.
So now, unto you, I heed all control.
It says in your word...
"I am the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect".
Yet, I've stumbled, fell, and have been less than perfect on this stroll.
Give me the strength to endure
to overcome the mistakes of my past.
The power to maintain with due diligence on this road.
And the wisdom to be thankful for what I have.

The mistakes have been mine.
Thinking that you needed my help.
However, now I realize that I can in no way do this by myself.
So, I surrender my will and all that I may think is right.
I rest in your love
And pray that you supply me with the mind of Christ.

I see now, that your way I don't fully understand,
But I trust and have faith that you... for my life, have a plan.
Therefore, I challenge you in this...
My life, my steps, and my breath...
for Your will, Your way... On Your word I stand.

I remove me, praying that the best for my life...
is Your plan.

I pray that this will not be living in vain.
I tried my way and went from bad to worst.
So, I surrender to you, that you will bless me and break this curse.



Friday, June 8, 2012

By Any Means Necessary

Envision a dream
Perception believed
Emotion contained…
Then reality achieved.
One goal attained, now on to the next.
Attempts to overwhelm…defeated,
Because of being spiritually blessed.
You see, before she was even born,
I spoke life into her life.
By the choosing of her name,
Even the acronym it contains.
I foresaw and I predict,
She will affect the world and
Inspire change.
Strong and mighty,
Bold, beautiful, and true.
To say that I am proud of her is an understatement…
Plus, I know that she is far from through.
There will be struggles,
But she was built to overcome.
There will be times when it seems that she is in the wrong lane.
But, I speak correction and direction into her spirit
and that she will be the leader of other ones…
lost, abused (physically or mentally),confused, a spokes person for the elderly,
and a mentor and guide to the youth.
I pray that God is first and foremost in her life
And that the strength of Jesus Christ allows her to achieve things that she never thought she’d do.
May she simply envision, perceive, and believe.
And not allow the thoughts of doubt to take hold.
But, diligently seek the Lord; then witness how the Lord blesses her steps down the road.


Thursday, May 31, 2012

Against All Odds

Against All Odds

Whether it be in the dark of the night…
Or the light by day.
Through the snickers, mockery, sneers, and jeers…
Or whatever ridicule that others may say.
Even when my circumstances seem less than favorable
And all my finances seem to disappear.
Until that day that my body begins to decay,
I will continue to praise and give glory to His holy and righteous name.
For He is the Author and Finisher of everything and His word will never change.
Against all odds…
I was created.
Not only to go through, but to overcome.
Not only to subdue, but to lead… like the righteous one.
His Son.
Against all odds…
In spite of the world.
In spite of man.
In spite of the norm.
In spite of the obstacles.
I stand.
I am and was created with a purpose.
Masterfully designed by the one and only God, I Am.
I am success.
I am joy.
I am love.
I am blessed.
Demons shutter upon my arrival, because of the spirit I employ.
When I open my mouth, thoughts of doubt, I destroy.
Yes, I am a child of God.
This I believe and I know is true.
Be blessed and walk in your authority;
for, you are a child of God too.

Against all odds.


Sunday, April 8, 2012

Thank God!!!

You do feel me.
I know that you are there.
I can feel you reading this.

You know how to contact me,
I'm here.


Do you hear me at night as I cry your name?
Do you feel my presence when I pray for you...
Or understand my turmoil as I look at your picture,

Tell me...

can you feel my pain?

All the years gone, tender moments missed.
The hugs that I long for, the conversations that I wish.
So much that I would love for us to share...
Hard times, good times, first loves, bad times...
Sadly, I wasn't there.

Hearing your voice gave me hope of what could be.
I pictured in my mind... us making up for lost time.
Actually being able to enjoy a day of you spending it with me.

Everything was going great and moving right along.
You told me, soon that you would be a father, but you still wanted visit me.
However, somewhere things went wrong.
I left messages with you friend,
Not to mention, the numerous times I called your phone.
I even tried your moms'...
phone disconnected, facebook profile... disappeared.
It's like you vanished into thin air
but I know your not gone.

I don't know what it is or where you might be.
Or what made you cease communication so suddenly.
I hope that you are doing better than good,
that things are going great.
I look forward to hearing from you again,
I pray for the day that I get to see you face to face.

I love you... Dad.


Thursday, March 29, 2012

Only By His Grace and Mercy

.words given: mercy,alien,widow,oppress,evil,aware,exclusive,regret,and empathy.

Oh precious moments of joy, laughter, and bliss.
Memories of old... love, prior to this sullen solace.
Entrenched in darkness, life seems so bleak.
I've become an alien to my spirit...succumbing to my sinful nature.
Rendering my soul unable to speak.
So when the evil temptations arise,
I find myself spiritually weak.

In the marriage of mind, body, spirit, and soul.
I have become a widow, fed by a carnal world, lies and stress.
Nothing of true value to possess... Just emptiness and regrets I console.
Left to oppress and be oppressed, in order to gain.
Only to never be fulfilled with true happiness and contentment.
Constantly seeking, but unable to obtain.

Evil spiritual forces know that I exist.
The darkness continually encroaches...
and in their un-heavenly schemes, they relentlessly persist.
It's as if,
they have peeked into my future and have considered me a threat.
The peace of mind,heart, and joy that I desire...
They don't want me to get.

Yet, I am aware... that in me... and... out there,
There is someone greater than me.
Whose strength can be found in my weakness,
and healing can be seen in my infirmity.
Who looks down on my situation with empathy.
Using what they plan for my destruction as vital instances,
the glue if you will, in creating the purposed, destined me.

So, what I'm going through is not exclusive to me.
All those who desire an exclusive relationship,
be it with a lover, brother, sister, mother, or a father who is heavenly...
will experience darkness, moments of trials and tribulation.
Even those who embrace the world experience throes by excluding themselves from His divination.

However, there will be a difference between them and me.
I submit all that I am to you, Lord, and all that I am to be. I can't do nothing without you.
Yet, I can overcome everything with you. I thank you in advance for the deliverance...
and for your unfailing grace and mercy.


Friday, February 24, 2012

Not to be called by any other name

Oh corruptible mind, lost in time.
Stuck in the past, future ahead seems so far behind.
Lost in my illusion ,or delusion should I say,
of emotions of grandeur.
More specifically those that love can portray.
All in my mind, the playing tricks on my heart.
It's just that I want something so bad- true love...
only to find a true farce.

Believing I'm special...
My love, my emotions, and all the affection that I have to give.
Only to find, which is always revealed in time, that I...
am no more special, unique, and/or complex than the last man.
Which I now realize, just like he probably did.

So, what is the purpose, the reason behind it all?
Live, enjoy life, eventually fall in love...
then for it all to be taken away and only be left with the fall.
Or maybe that dreaded phrase, "let's just be friends" or
"I'll give you a call".

Does that mean live life bitter?
Not look forward to falling in love at all?
Most definitely not, always look forward to the upliftment, not the fall.
Don't focus on the initial emotion or the commotion that it can bring.
Learn to love yourself for who and what you are.
Once that's done, your heart will sing.

Sing of praises, sing of joy. The partner that you attract then will be true.
Not just a fleeting moment of lustful noise.
They will love you for you and you will love them for the friends that you have became.
It won't be based on lustful acts or physical attributes
Or maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic, in love with love,
not to be called by any other name.


Friday, February 17, 2012

This is all I ask....

Create in the moment
A moment of clarity,
A moment of truth.

Show me the way,
The way to live,
The way to love,
Vibrant, pure and closer to you.

I don't know,
No... no, yes I do.
Transition me from the place where I am
To a smooth existence, a bright light leading others, that are like me confused, to you.

Help me;
For, the choices are many,
but my decisions are few.

I'm told that I am a rare precious creation, a jewel...
Your child created, specifically with a purpose, by you.

However, I'm confused, and instead of clarity...
I run to drugs, lust... the addictions that I use.
My spirit yearns to do what is right,
but it's my flesh that has me do what I know I should not do.

I know that I'm his wife...
that he should be the affection of my life,
but my mind, my eyes, my femininity
shows me and tells me that
there are so many other loves'...
lusts to choose.

I say, I'm going to do the right thing.
I bought a replacement for my pawned wedding ring.
Then, I wonder if I'm being true to myself.
He asked me if I was in love with him, I told him no.
Oh God, I need your help!

Create a moment of clarity.
A moment of truth.

Show me the way,
The way to live,
The way to love,
Vibrant, pure and closer to you.

Then, after that...
Give me the strength to follow your instructions through.